How to Negotiate a Pay Raise (And Actually Get It)

82% of U.S. workers who asked for a raise in 2024 got one, yet only 11% think asking works. Learn negotiation tips from expert Jenny Wood to advocate for yourself!

Ask and you shall receive? According to a 2024 survey of 2,000 U.S. workers, 82% of full-time workers who asked for a raise last year got one. Yet only 11% believed that asking is the most effective strategy for getting a pay bump. Even more surprising? While 65% of workers expected to get a raise in 2024, most are waiting for it to happen naturally.

Most people think excellent performance alone will lead to better pay – 37% said it’s the best path to a raise. But here’s what I’ve learned after years of studying workplace dynamics: Great work is just the foundation. The real key? Knowing how to advocate for yourself.

To help me tackle this challenging topic, I invited Jenny Wood, author of the groundbreaking book WILD COURAGE: Go After What You Want and Get It. Jenny is a former Google executive who helped drive billions in annual revenue. In her 18 years there, rising from entry-level to senior leader, she also founded Own Your Career, one of Google’s largest career programs in the company’s history.

What Makes a Successful Salary Negotiation?

Before we dive into specific strategies, let’s understand the three core elements that make someone successful at negotiating their worth:

1. Preparation: The most successful negotiators don’t wing it. They come armed with data, practice their talking points, and anticipate potential objections.

2. Timing: Common sense dictates it’s best to ask your boss for a raise when she’s in a good mood and not distracted with an urgent issue or trying to get out the door before her vacation starts. In addition, Jenny recommends understanding your company’s performance review cycle. “At some point in the year, your boss and their colleagues gather to discuss the organization’s talent. Know when that happens and schedule a career development discussion on your manager’s calendar. In this meeting, highlight your accomplishments and contributions. Most importantly, let your boss know clearly that you want to be considered for a salary raise.”

3. Mindset: This is perhaps the most crucial element. Asking for a raise can feel uncomfortable, awkward, and downright scary. As Jenny Wood explains, “Make yourself the priority. We’re all told in one way or another to toe the line and fit in. It takes effort to break out of that old thinking and put yourself first.”

Let’s break down each element and turn you into a negotiation powerhouse.

The SELFISH Trait: Be Your Own Champion

In Wild Courage, Jenny reveals how the traits you need to get ahead are the exact opposite of what you’ve been told. To be successful, you need to be: Weird, Selfish, Shameless, Obsessed, Nosy, Manipulative, Brutal, Reckless, and Bossy. When used in a sane and savvy way, these traits become superpowers.

Have you ever eaten lukewarm mashed potatoes at a restaurant because you didn’t want to “make a fuss”? Jenny conducted a goal-achievement assessment online that, in part, indicated how bold people are. Of the several thousand respondents across ninety countries, 67 percent asserted, “I ask for what I want.” Yet only 36 percent said, “I’m comfortable asking for a raise,” and, believe it or not, only 23 percent would send the potatoes back.

Is it any wonder this same hesitation holds us back in salary negotiations?

Action Step:

Practice being your own champion in low-stakes situations:

• Send back the cold muffin at your local café
• Ask for a discount if an item is slightly damaged
• Request a better table at a restaurant if you’re seated by the kitchen

Remember: If you won’t advocate for yourself, who will?

Check out Wild Courage and receive special book bonuses when you order a copy, including scripts to ask for a pay raise and much more.

Understanding Your WINN (What I Need Now)

One of the biggest mistakes people make is sticking to outdated goals or agreements. Jenny Wood introduces us to the WINN principle: What I Need Now.

Let me share a story about Sarah. She had been covering three full-time positions since her company’s layoffs, initially grateful to keep her job. But she struggled to ask for appropriate compensation when the company’s fortunes improved and they didn’t rehire. Sound familiar?

Action Step: Take the “Friend Test”:

1. Imagine a friend in your exact situation

2. Write down what advice you’d give them

3. Apply that same advice to yourself

Growing the Pie: Beyond the Basic Raise

According to Jenny, many people go wrong when they focus solely on salary. But expert negotiators know about widening the ZOPA (Zone of Possible Agreement).

For example, when Jack negotiated his last contract, he noticed his potential employer was hesitant about the salary number. Instead of pushing harder, he grew the pie by discussing:

• Flexible work arrangements
• Additional vacation days
• Professional development budget
• Performance-based bonuses
• Title change

Action Step: Create your negotiation wishlist:

1. List everything you want (don’t self-censor!)

2. Rank items by importance

3. Identify which items might be easier for your employer to grant

Taking the Dance Break: Timing Your Negotiation

“While working at Harvard Business School, I helped with a research project under negotiations professor, Michael Wheeler,” Jenny shares. “We found that simply taking a few minutes alone before a crucial decision improved outcomes. Call it a dance break. Every negotiation is a dance; sometimes, you must step away from the dance floor, take a breath, and get some perspective. Letting the other side pressure you to move forward leads to poor results.”

This brings us to a critical point: Never negotiate under pressure. That urgent feeling that you must respond immediately? That’s your fight-or-flight response talking, not your strategic mind.

Action Step:

Build in breathing room:

• Schedule the conversation for a time when you’re both fresh (morning often works best)
• If pressured for an immediate answer, use phrases like “I need to review the details” or “Let me check my calendar and get back to you”
• Take a literal “dance break” before big negotiations to reset your energy

See How to Negotiate (With 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Win) for more.

The Data Deep Dive

You want to come to your negotiation prepared with market data. How do you find the data? Here’s how to arm yourself with the right numbers:

Research Your Market Value:

• Check salary databases (Glassdoor, PayScale, Salary.com)
• Network with industry peers
• Review job postings for similar positions
• Connect with recruiters in your field

Total Compensation Calculator

Don’t just focus on base salary. Calculate your total package:

• Base Salary
• Annual Bonus (% range)
• Stock Options/RSUs
• Benefits Value:
  • Health Insurance: $5,000-15,000/year
  • 401(k) Match: Typically 3-6%
  • Professional Development: $2,000-5,000/year
  • Remote Work Savings: $2,000-6,000/year

Document Your Wins:

• Keep a “wins folder” with positive feedback - see 27 Tips to Stand Out at Work (and Get Noticed Instantly)
• Track projects where you’ve added value
• Calculate revenue generated or costs saved
• Note additional responsibilities you’ve taken on

Action Step: Create your “value sheet”:

1. List your top 5 achievements from the past year

2. Quantify results where possible (numbers, percentages, dollars)

3. Gather supporting documentation (emails, reports, testimonials)

Want to add to your wins list? Check out our resource for the best thing you can do to improve your social skills:

The Actual Conversation: Scripts That Work

Let’s get tactical. Here are some proven conversation starters:

Opening the Discussion:

“I’ve been researching market rates for my position and reviewing my contributions over the past year. I’d like to discuss adjusting my compensation to better align with both.”

Instead of:

“I was hoping we could maybe talk about my salary…”

Presenting Your Case:

“In the past year, I’ve taken on X and Y responsibilities, leading to a 20% increase in team productivity. Additionally, my project Z generated $100K in new revenue. Based on market research and these contributions, I’m seeking a salary adjustment to $X.”

Instead of:

“I work really hard and I think I deserve more money.”

Action Step:

Role-play your conversation:

• Practice with a friend or record yourself
• Try different scenarios (positive response, pushback, deflection)
• Time your pitch (aim for 2-3 minutes initially)
• Want confidence tips? Check out 15 Strategies For More Confidence

For even more scripts, check out Jenny’s book, Wild Courage. Get bonuses from her website.

Handling Pushback

While hearing objections is tough, Jenny advises to think about every negotiation as a way to benefit everyone.

“Seek to grow the pie instead of simply your slice. Find a way for everyone to get more of what they each want, and they will be even more flexible and gracious with you later.”

If you hear “no” to your initial request, don’t retreat—explore alternatives. Here are common objections and how to handle them:

“It’s not in the budget right now.”

Your response: “I understand budget constraints. Could we discuss a timeline for revisiting this conversation? In the meantime, I’d like to explore other ways to grow in my role, such as additional responsibilities or professional development opportunities.”

“Your performance doesn’t justify this increase.”

Your response: “I appreciate that feedback. Could we set specific performance metrics for the next three months? I’d like to demonstrate my value and revisit this conversation once I’ve met those goals.”

Common Mistakes of Salary Negotiation

While knowing what to do is important, understanding what not to do can be equally valuable. Here are the most common mistakes that can derail your salary negotiation:

1. No Apologies “I’m sorry to bring this up, but…” or “I hate to ask, but…” Starting your negotiation with an apology immediately undermines your position. It suggests you don’t believe you deserve what you’re asking for. Instead, approach the conversation with confidence: “I’d like to discuss my compensation based on my recent contributions.”

2. The Comparison Complex “Alisa makes more than me, and I do the same job!” Comparing yourself to colleagues is a fast track to nowhere. Not only is it unprofessional, but you also don’t have full context about their experience, negotiation history, average cost of labor in their market, or performance metrics. Keep the focus on your value and local market rates.

3. The Ultimatum Error “If I don’t get this raise, I’ll have to look elsewhere.” Unless you’re prepared to walk away immediately, avoid ultimatums. They can damage relationships and limit future opportunities. Instead, focus on collaborative problem-solving: “I’m committed to growing with the company. How can we work together to align my compensation with my contributions?”

4. The Timing Crunch Strategic timing is crucial for success. Approaching your boss during any of the following can lead to poor results.

• During a crisis
• Right after budget cuts
• At the end of a stressful day
• Without scheduling dedicated time

A Real-World Case Study: Marie’s 22% Raise

When a crisis hit, Marie found herself managing not just her usual marketing team but also taking on digital transformation initiatives for her company. After 18 months of expanded responsibilities, she decided to negotiate.

The Challenge:

• Working remotely made it harder to showcase her impact
• The company was cautious about spending due to economic uncertainty
• Traditional in-person negotiation tactics weren’t applicable

Her Strategy:

1. Documentation: She created a detailed digital portfolio showing:

   • A 47% increase in team productivity
   • $230,000 in cost savings from new digital processes
   • Leadership of 3 major cross-functional projects

2. Preparation: Before her virtual negotiation, Marie:

   • Practiced with her camera on
   • Ensured good lighting and audio
   • Prepared slides to share key metrics

3. Execution: During the video call, she:

   • Shared her screen with key achievements
   • Used silence strategically
   • Maintained strong virtual eye contact (Pro tip: cover the onscreen image of you so you’re not tempted to look at yourself)

The Result: Marie secured a 22% raise, additional stock options, and a new title reflecting her expanded responsibilities.

Key Takeaway: Remote work doesn’t mean you can’t negotiate effectively—it just requires different tactics.

Negotiating in Special Circumstances

Negotiating at a Startup

Unlike established companies, startups often offer compensation packages heavily weighted toward equity, promising substantial future gains that offset lower initial salaries. When evaluating such offers, consider not just the immediate salary but also:

• the company’s growth trajectory
• market position
• funding stability

Negotiating Remote Pay Raises

The rise of remote work has introduced new complexities to compensation discussions, particularly regarding geographic adjustments. Companies now must navigate how to fairly compensate employees across different regions while accounting for varying costs of living. This often includes discussions about:

• home office stipends
• technology allowances
• travel budgets for periodic team gatherings

Tailoring to International Markets

Cross-cultural negotiations add another layer of complexity, with each major market bringing its own unique expectations and practices.

• In Asian markets, successful negotiations often hinge on building strong relationships first, with an emphasis on indirect communication and group consensus.
• European negotiations typically center around work-life balance, with considerable attention paid to vacation time and social benefits.
• By contrast, American market negotiations tend to be more direct and individualistic, focusing heavily on performance metrics and personal achievement. Understanding these cultural nuances can make the difference between a successful negotiation and a missed opportunity, particularly in global organizations where multiple cultural approaches may need to be balanced.

After the Handshake: Securing Your Negotiation Success

You scheduled with your manager, came to the negotiating table prepared and confident, and scored a YES! To be on the safe side, Jenny recommends several key follow-ups:

Immediate Follow-Up (within 24-48 Hours)

1. Send a thank-you email summarizing:

   • Agreed-upon changes
   • Implementation timeline
   • Any contingencies
   • Next steps

2. Documentation Process - Create a personal file containing:

   • Original offer letter/email
   • Negotiation notes
   • Final agreement details
   • Performance expectations
   • Timeline for implementation

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) About Negotiating a Pay Raise

When is the best time to ask for a raise?

The ideal time is during your annual review, after completing a major project, or when taking on significant new responsibilities. Avoid company-wide busy seasons or during known budget constraints.

What if I’m told to wait six months?

Get the timeline in writing and establish clear metrics for success. Use this time to document your achievements and continue growing your skills.

Should I mention another job offer?

Only if it’s genuine and you’re prepared to take it. Using phantom offers as leverage can damage trust.

What if I’m told no?

Ask for specific feedback and create an action plan. Consider negotiating other benefits or establishing a timeline for revisiting the conversation.

**How do I negotiate during a company merger? **

Focus on your unique value in the transition, such as documenting knowledge you have to help people, highlighting cross-team relationships, emphasizing the stability you provide, and presenting your retention value.

**What if my company has a salary freeze? **

Explore creative alternatives such as future-dated increases, performance bonuses, additional PTO, professional development budgets, and flexible scheduling.

How do I handle multiple offers simultaneously?

Avoid burning bridges by handling each offer with respect and professionalism. Keep all parties informed to maintain good communication throughout the process. Avoid using offers as leverage unless you are fully prepared to walk away from any of them. Create a decision matrix with weighted priorities to help you evaluate your options objectively. Consider long-term growth potential when making your final decision.

How do I negotiate a promotion versus an external offer?

Compare total packages by thoroughly evaluating all aspects of each offer. Look at internal growth potential to determine how each opportunity aligns with your career goals. What is the culture fit like at each company, and how well do you think you’ll adapt to it? Consider existing relationships and whether you will lose key contacts by leaving your current job. Conduct a risk assessment by examining the “What if” scenarios for each option. Evaluate the learning curve investment and ask yourself if you are prepared to address it at a new company.

Takeaways on Negotiating Your Worth

Remember these key points:

• Be SELFISH: Champion your own cause
• Know your WINN: What you need now might be different from what you needed before
• Grow the pie: Look for ways to create value for everyone
• Take the dance break: Never negotiate under pressure
• Come prepared: Data beats emotion every time
• Follow up: Document agreements and next steps

The next time you’re negotiating a pay raise, remember the cold mashed potatoes example. If you wouldn’t accept subpar food you’re paying for, why accept subpar compensation for work you’re delivering?

Want to dive deeper into negotiation psychology? Check out our article on “How to Negotiate (With 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Win)” Want to learn more about Jenny Wood and the Wild Courage book? Check out her website and receive special book bonuses when you order a copy, including scripts to ask for a pay raise and much more.