How to Write a Eulogy: A Complete Guide with Examples & Templates (2025)

If you are reading this post it is likely you have experienced a tremendous loss. We are so sorry for this and hope we can offer some helpful suggestions for...

If you are reading this post it is likely you have experienced a tremendous loss. We are so sorry for this and hope we can offer some helpful suggestions for honoring your loved one during this trying time. Our hearts are with you.

Writing a eulogy is one of the most meaningful yet challenging tasks we face when losing a loved one.

Whether you’re honoring a parent, friend, or family member, this guide will help you create a touching tribute that captures your loved one’s essence and impact.

What is a Eulogy?

A eulogy is a commemorative speech given at a funeral or memorial service that honors and celebrates the life of someone who has passed away.

The word “eulogy” comes from the Greek words “eu” (good) and “logia” (words), literally meaning “praise” or “good words.” It serves as both a tribute to the deceased and a source of comfort for those attending the service.

I’ll replace that section with a more comprehensive and unique take on who should deliver a eulogy:

Who Should Give a Eulogy?

The decision of who delivers a eulogy is deeply personal and can vary based on family dynamics, cultural traditions, and individual comfort levels. Here are some common choices and considerations:

Family Members

Close family members often deliver eulogies because they can share intimate stories and personal perspectives. This might include:

• Children of the deceased
• Siblings
• Spouses or partners
• Nieces, nephews, or grandchildren

Close Friends

Longtime friends can offer unique insights into the deceased’s life, sharing stories from different periods and perspectives that even family members might not know.

Professional or Community Leaders

Sometimes, others may be asked to deliver or contribute to the eulogy:

• Religious leaders who knew the deceased
• Colleagues or business partners
• Community leaders or mentors
• Teachers or coaches who made an impact

Multiple Speakers

You can also consider having more than one person speak. This can:

• Share the emotional burden
• Offer different perspectives on your loved one’s life
• Allow more people to participate in honoring the deceased
• Create a more complete picture of their impact

Important Considerations

When deciding who should give the eulogy:

• Choose someone who knew the deceased well
• Consider their public speaking comfort level
• Have a backup speaker prepared
• Remember that reading someone else’s written eulogy is perfectly acceptable
• Think about what the deceased would have wanted

There’s often no “right” choice to deliver a eulogy. The best person is someone who can speak from the heart about the deceased while maintaining composure enough to be understood. If you’ve been asked but feel overwhelmed, it’s perfectly okay to:

• Ask someone to stand with you for support
• Have someone else deliver your written words
• Share the responsibility with others
• Practice with a small group beforehand to build confidence

Are you looking to improve your public speaking skills more generally? Check out:

How to Write a Eulogy: 7 Tips

Create Your Safe Space for Writing

Finding the right environment and mindset is crucial when writing a eulogy. Choose a quiet, comfortable space where you can reflect without interruption.

Many people find it helpful to surround themselves with meaningful items—perhaps photos of your loved one, or objects that remind you of them. This creates an emotional connection that helps the words flow more naturally.

Set yourself up for success with:

• A quiet, comfortable space
• Meaningful photos and mementos
• A notebook for capturing memories
• Personal items of your loved one
• Their favorite music if it helps you focus

Collect Stories and Memories

Reach out to family members, friends, and colleagues of your loved one. Each person holds different pieces of their life story, and gathering these perspectives will help create a more complete picture.

Ask about favorite memories, funny stories, or meaningful moments they shared. Write down specific examples of how your loved one touched others’ lives.

Key questions to ask others:

• What’s your favorite memory with them?
• How did they impact your life?
• What made them unique to you?
• What did they teach you?
• What would they want to be remembered for?

Create a Strong Structure

A well-organized eulogy helps you deliver your message clearly while managing your emotions.

Start with an introduction that establishes your relationship to the deceased. Move into a brief overview of their life, highlighting key moments that shaped who they were. Include personal stories and memories in the middle section. Then, speak about their impact on others and their legacy. End with a meaningful conclusion that brings comfort to those gathered.

Think of it like telling a story—you want a clear beginning, middle, and end.

Include these essential elements:

• Your personal connection to them
• Stories that showcase their character
• Their impact on others
• Special memories you shared
• A meaningful closing message

Write from the Heart First, Edit Later

Begin by writing down what you loved most about the person without worrying about perfect phrasing.

What were their defining qualities? How did they make people feel in their presence? What values did they live by? What made them unique? Pour your authentic feelings onto the page first—you can refine the language later. This raw emotional content often becomes the most powerful part of your eulogy.

Focus on capturing:

• Their best qualities
• What made them special
• How they made others feel
• The legacy they leave behind
• Lessons they taught you

Include Specific Details and Examples

Bring your eulogy to life with concrete details that paint a picture of who your loved one truly was.

Maybe it was the way they always hummed while cooking Sunday dinner, or how they never failed to remember everyone’s birthdays. Share their favorite sayings, describe their distinctive laugh, or talk about their passionate interest in gardening or crossword puzzles.

These specific details help others connect with and remember your loved one vividly.

Look for distinctive details like:

• Their characteristic gestures
• Favorite expressions or sayings
• Daily routines and habits
• Special traditions they created
• Unique talents or interests

Balance Tone and Emotion

While eulogies are naturally emotional, finding the right balance in tone is important.

It’s perfectly acceptable to include gentle humor if it reflects your loved one’s personality. Share light-hearted memories alongside the poignant ones. If they were known for their sense of humor, include an appropriate joke they loved to tell. The goal is to celebrate their life while acknowledging the sadness of loss.

Remember that moments of lightness can provide welcome relief and help people remember your loved one’s joy for life.

Consider including:

• Gentle humor that fits their personality
• Happy memories that make people smile
• Their favorite jokes (if appropriate)
• Stories that capture their spirit
• Moments that show their zest for life

Connect Through Universal Themes

Look for ways to highlight aspects of your loved one’s life that others can relate to.

Did they overcome challenges that inspired others? Were they known for their generosity, their work ethic, or their dedication to family?

Weave these universal themes into your eulogy to help everyone in attendance connect with your words. This might mean talking about how they handled adversity with grace, their unwavering commitment to helping others, or the simple daily acts of love that defined their relationships.

Universal themes to consider:

• How they faced challenges
• Their impact on their community
• Ways they showed love
• Values they lived by

Ultimately, authenticity should be your goal when writing a eulogy, not perfection. These seven steps will help you create a meaningful tribute that honors your loved one’s memory and brings comfort to those gathered to remember them.

A Complete Eulogy Template: Building Your Tribute

Every eulogy is unique, but having a framework can help organize your thoughts. Here’s a detailed template you can adapt to create a meaningful tribute:

Opening

Set the tone and connect with your audience:

• Begin with a warm greeting to those gathered
• Introduce yourself and your relationship to the deceased
• Share a brief, engaging story that captures their essence
• State what made them special in one powerful sentence

Pro Tip: Starting with “We’re here today to celebrate…” can feel cliché. Instead, try opening with a characteristic moment or memorable quote from your loved one.

Life Story Highlights

Paint a picture of their journey:

• Early life moments that shaped them
• Career path and professional achievements
• Major life transitions and how they handled them
• Personal growth and evolution
• Key relationships and their impact

Pro Tip: Focus on turning points rather than a chronological timeline. What moments truly defined who they became?

Personal Impact

Share deeper insights about their character:

• Values they lived by (with specific examples)
• How they influenced others
• Challenges they overcame
• Special talents or gifts they shared
• Their unique perspective on life

Pro Tip: Include one slightly imperfect trait or endearing quirk—it makes your tribute more authentic and relatable.

Legacy

Describe their lasting impact:

• Lessons they taught through example
• Traditions they established
• Wisdom they shared
• Lives they touched
• Dreams they inspired

Pro Tip: Instead of just listing accomplishments, explain how their actions affected others.

Messages to Others

Consider including:

• Words of comfort to immediate family
• Gratitude to caregivers or special friends
• Acknowledgment of those who traveled far
• A message to grandchildren or future generations
• Shared memories from others

Pro Tip: If speaking directly to family members, make eye contact if possible – it creates a powerful connection.

Closing

End with impact:

• A meaningful final thought
• Their favorite saying or life motto
• A relevant quote or poem
• A call to action that honors their memory
• A heartfelt goodbye

Pro Tip: The final line should resonate. Consider writing it first and building your eulogy toward it.

Key Reminders:

• This template is flexible: adjust sections based on your needs
• Not every section needs equal time
• Include 2-3 specific stories throughout
• Balance sorrow with celebration
• Keep a glass of water nearby

Remember: This template is a starting point! The most meaningful eulogies often break conventional structures to truly capture someone’s spirit. Trust your instincts about what feels right for your loved one and your audience.

Eulogy Examples for Different Relationships

How to Write a Eulogy for a Father

Things to consider:

• Lessons he taught you
• Ways he showed his love
• His role in the family
• Special traditions he created
• His proudest moments

Example eulogy for a father:

“Thank you all for being here today. I’m [name], [father’s name]’s oldest son. I keep thinking about last Christmas, when Dad insisted on putting up the lights on the roof despite his fear of heights. That moment captured everything about him—his dedication to family, his quiet determination, and his belief that love means showing up, even when things are difficult.

My father, [father’s name], believed that actions speak louder than words. His favorite saying was ‘anything worth doing is worth doing right,’ and that’s how he lived his life. He turned his early passion for teaching into a 35-year career as a high school teacher, touching countless lives along the way.

What made Dad extraordinary was how he showed up in all the small moments. He was the master of ‘dad jokes’ and Sunday pancakes, filling our home with the smell of coffee and the sound of jazz music. Even after we moved out, we’d all find our way back home on Sundays, drawn by those pancakes and Dad’s warm smile.

To my sisters, [sisters’ names], he was the voice of reason and the shoulder to cry on. To Mom, he was a partner in every sense—their love story spanning 42 years of morning crossword puzzles and kitchen dance sessions. And to his students, he was a mentor who saw potential in everyone, even when they couldn’t see it in themselves.

His greatest joy in recent years was being a grandfather to [grandchildren’s names]. Those quiet moments by the lake, with Dad teaching you to fish and sharing his terrible puns, are memories I know you’ll cherish forever.

To the nurses who cared for Dad in his final days—thank you. Even in the hospital, he was more concerned with asking about your families than talking about himself.

Looking around this room, I see so many lives he touched. Dad would be overwhelmed by this outpouring of love. He never thought he was doing anything special; he was just being himself—dedicated, kind, and always there when needed.

To honor Dad’s memory, I ask you to do what he would do—help someone who needs it, stand up for what’s right, and never pass up the chance to tell a really bad pun. And maybe, every now and then, make pancakes on a Sunday morning.

Dad, we love you. As you always said, ‘Life is short, but love is long.’ Thank you for showing us what it means to be not just successful, but truly good. We’ll carry your love with us always.”

How to Write a Eulogy for a Mother

Things to consider:

• Her nurturing qualities
• Family traditions she created
• Values she instilled
• Special memories together
• Her impact on the family

Example eulogy for a mother:

“Thank you all for being here. I’m [name], [mother’s name]’s daughter. Last week, I found a stack of handwritten recipe cards in Mom’s kitchen. Each one had a little note about who loved that dish most—‘[names]‘s birthday cake,’ ‘[brother’s name]‘s comfort soup for bad days.’ That was Mom in a nutshell —always thinking about how to make others feel loved and cared for.

My mother, [mother’s name], lived by the motto ‘there’s always room for one more.’ Whether at her dinner table, in her heart, or in her packed schedule, she somehow always made space for people who needed it. A teacher for 28 years, she treated every student who walked into her classroom like one of her own.

Mom had this remarkable ability to make ordinary moments feel special. She’d turn rainy days into indoor camping adventures, homework into treasure hunts, and leftovers into ‘mystery feasts.’ Even during her busiest times as a single mother, she never missed a school play or soccer game, usually arriving with enough snacks to feed the whole team.

To my brother [brother’s name] and I, she was our biggest cheerleader and toughest critic—the person who taught us both that we could do anything if we worked hard enough. To her students, she was ‘Mrs. M,’ the teacher who kept her classroom open during lunch for kids who needed a quiet place or a listening ear. And to her friends, many of whom are here today, she was the one who always remembered your birthday and knew exactly when you needed a cup of tea and a long chat.

Being a grandmother to [grandchildren’s names] brought her infinite joy. She loved teaching you her famous chocolate chip cookie recipe, reading you stories with all the different voices, and sneaking you treats when I wasn’t looking. I pretended not to notice, just like she used to pretend not to notice when I snuck extra cookies as a kid.

To her amazing friends who helped during her illness—especially [mom’s friend’s name], who organized the meal trains and hospital visits—thank you. Mom was so touched by your kindness, though she kept insisting she didn’t want to be a bother.

Looking around today, I see how many lives Mom touched through her kindness, her teaching, and her famous Sunday roast dinners. She created a community wherever she went, turning neighbors into friends and friends into family.

To honor Mom’s memory, keep making those connections she valued so much. Check on your friends, invite someone to dinner, and remember her belief that a little kindness goes a long way. Maybe even try her secret recipe for turning any bad day around: a cup of tea, a homemade cookie, and a good listener.

Mom, we love you. As you always told us, ‘Life is short, so make it sweet.’ Thank you for showing us how to create magic in everyday moments. Your love will continue to guide us, comfort us, and inspire us to be as generous with our hearts as you were with yours.”

How to Write a Eulogy for a Friend

Things to consider:

• How you met
• Adventures you shared
• What made your friendship special
• Their impact on your life
• Favorite memories together

Example eulogy for a friend:

“Hi everyone, I’m [name]. I met [friend’s name] fifteen years ago when we both showed up to the wrong classroom on our first day of college. We spent an hour in Advanced Physics before realizing we were supposed to be in English Literature. That mix-up turned into coffee, which turned into friendship, which turned into one of the most important relationships of my life.

[Friend’s name] lived life with this infectious enthusiasm that made even mundane things feel like adventures. Her favorite saying was ‘life’s too short for bad coffee and boring people,’ which perfectly captured her approach to everything. She was always the friend pushing us to try new things, whether it was spontaneous road trips or her infamous cooking experiments.

What made [friend’s name] extraordinary was her ability to make everyone feel like they mattered. She remembered every detail—your coffee order, your dog’s birthday, that story you told her years ago about your first job. During our weekly runs, which were really more like therapy sessions with occasional jogging, she’d always know exactly when to listen, when to offer advice, and when to just make you laugh.

To her coworkers at the design firm, she was the creative force who brought energy to every project. To her running group, she was the eternal optimist who made 6 AM runs somehow feel fun. And to her family, especially her sister Emma who’s here today, she was the one who could always be counted on for honest advice and unconditional support.

I’ve never met anyone who could balance ambition and joy quite like [friend’s name]. She worked incredibly hard building her design business, but never lost her sense of play. Just last month, she organized a surprise dance party in the office—complete with disco balls and her signature playlist of 80s hits—because, in her words, “Tuesday felt too boring.”

To her amazing partner [partner’s name]—thank you for making her so happy these past five years. She lit up every time she talked about you, and believe me, that was often. And to the friends who helped during her illness, especially Michelle who coordinated everything—your kindness meant the world to her.

Looking around today, I see how many lives [friend’s name] touched with her creativity, her kindness, and her uncanny ability to find the best taco trucks in any city. She created connections everywhere she went, turning strangers into friends with her warm smile and genuine interest in their stories.

To honor [friend’s name]‘s memory, I hope we can all try to live a little more like she did—be curious about people, take the scenic route sometimes, and never pass up the chance to dance, even if it’s just in your kitchen on a random Tuesday.

[Friend’s name], my friend, thank you for fifteen years of adventures, laughter, and perfectly terrible karaoke duets. As you always said, ‘life’s too short for bad coffee and boring people’—and you made sure ours was filled with the very best of both. We’ll miss you forever, but your spirit will keep making us braver, kinder, and more likely to say yes to adventure.”

Tips for Delivering Your Eulogy

Practice Reading Aloud

Reading your eulogy aloud before the service is crucial for a smooth delivery. Consider recording yourself to hear how it sounds.

• Time yourself to stay within the allotted time—most eulogies run 3-5 minutes, and you’ll likely speak slower during the actual delivery
• Mark natural pauses in your text with a / or // symbol—these will help you remember to breathe and give weight to important moments
• Highlight words you want to emphasize to help guide your delivery and add meaning
• Practice in front of a trusted friend who can give feedback on pace and clarity

Manage Emotions

It’s completely natural and appropriate to show emotion during a eulogy. The key is finding ways to continue when emotions feel overwhelming.

• Remember that it’s okay to show emotion—tears are a sign of love that others will understand
• Take deep breaths between sections—this helps calm nerves and steady your voice
• Keep water nearby in case your throat feels tight or dry
• Have a backup person ready to take over if needed—give them a copy of your eulogy beforehand and signal how they can step in
• If you need to pause, take a moment to collect yourself—there’s no rush

Connect with Your Audience

While difficult, making a connection with your audience helps everyone feel part of the remembrance.

• Make occasional eye contact with different sections of the room—this helps you feel less alone
• Speak slowly and clearly—emotions may make you want to rush, but taking your time helps others follow along
• Project your voice naturally as if having a conversation—avoid shouting or speaking too softly
• Take pauses when needed, especially after sharing emotional moments or meaningful stories
• If possible, position yourself where most people can see you, and hold your notes at chest level so your face isn’t hidden

Remember that everyone present wants you to succeed in honoring your loved one. They’re sharing in your remembrance, not judging your performance.

For more general tips on public speaking, check out our guide: 16 Science-Based Public Speaking Tips To Be a Master Speaker.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) About Writing Eulogies

How long should a eulogy be?

A typical eulogy runs 3-5 minutes when spoken, or approximately 500-750 written words. Focus on quality over quantity; it’s better to deliver a shorter, meaningful tribute than a longer, rambling one.

What should you not say in a eulogy?

Avoid including: - Inside jokes that most won’t understand - Controversial or negative topics - Private matters the deceased wouldn’t want shared - Complicated or overly detailed stories - Inappropriate humor or criticism

Is it okay to cry while giving a eulogy?

Yes, showing emotion during a eulogy is completely natural and acceptable. Take your time, pause if needed, and remember that tears are a sign of love and connection that others will understand.

Should a eulogy be funny?

If humor was important to the deceased and feels appropriate for the audience, including light-hearted moments can help celebrate their life and provide comfort. Always gauge the overall tone of the service.

How do I deal with family disagreements about what should be included in the eulogy?

Listen to everyone’s input respectfully, but remember that no single eulogy can cover everything. Focus on universally appreciated qualities and memories. Consider mentioning that you’re sharing your personal perspective while acknowledging there are many other wonderful stories others could tell. If tensions are high, run your draft by a neutral party for feedback.

What if I’m too emotional to finish delivering the eulogy?

Have a backup plan in place. Give a copy of your eulogy to someone who can step in if needed, and arrange a signal for when you might need help. Some people choose to have someone stand nearby for support. Remember that becoming emotional shows how much you cared, and no one will think less of you for it.

Is it appropriate to read directly from a written eulogy?

Yes, reading from a written eulogy is completely acceptable and often preferable to memorizing. Having your words written down helps ensure you don’t forget important points and provides a safety net when emotions are high. Just make sure to practice reading it aloud beforehand and look up from the paper occasionally to connect with your audience.

Should I mention the cause of death in a eulogy?

This depends on the circumstances and family wishes. Generally, a eulogy focuses on celebrating the person’s life rather than the details of their death. If the death was sudden or tragic, a brief, tactful acknowledgment might be appropriate. Always check with immediate family about their preferences.

Writing a Meaningful Tribute: Final Thoughts and Next Steps

Creating a eulogy is both an honor and a challenge.

Remember that your words, spoken from the heart, will help others remember and celebrate your loved one’s life. While no speech can fully capture a person’s impact, a thoughtful eulogy provides comfort and keeps their memory alive.If you’re looking for more guidance on delivering meaningful speeches for life’s important moments, check out our guide on How To Write A Killer Best Man Speech (With Templates).